14 Mar Thought Management, Part 2: How to Change Your Thinking (& Your Life!) Using a Thought Record [plus video]
In Thought Management, Part 1, we learned about the connection between thoughts, feelings, the body, and behavior. We learned about the thousands of automatic thoughts that run through our minds each day, and how one little, unnoticed thought can lead to a whole lot of trouble if we do nothing about it. (If you haven’t read it yet, I suggest you do!).
In Part 2, we shift our focus to what we can do about our thoughts, using a little tool I love, called a “thought record”.
One of the Best Tools for Thought Management: The Thought Record
A thought record is just a piece of paper with several different columns, including: “Date,” “Situation,” “Automatic Thoughts,” “Feelings,” and “Rate Feelings 1-10”. However, when used correctly, that little piece of paper can allow you to step back and look at thoughts objectively, to see which thoughts are “truthful” and which are not so truthful, and provide you with the chance to change the thoughts you don’t want. Initially, a thought record helps you notice your automatic thoughts, write them down, and learn to tease them apart from what you’re feeling. In time, a thought record can also help you identify and alter false thoughts and beliefs into something more helpful and truthful for you.
Today we’re focusing on the first steps of using a thought record: learning to identify difficult situations, thoughts, and emotions, and writing them out. I’ve attached a copy of a basic thought record, below, for you to view or to print and use, if you’d like.
Thought Record, Part 1; www.DrChristinaHibbert.com
How to Use a Thought Record: 3-Minute Therapy
Since it’s much easier to show you how to use a thought record than to write it out, I made this video, as part of my “3-Minute Therapy” series. I urge you to take 3 minutes and watch as I explain exactly how the thought record works. Then, join me back below for a couple more points to get you on your way.
“Change Your Thinking with a Thought Record: 3-Minute Therapy w/Dr. Christina Hibbert, YouTube
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6 Tips on Using a Thought Record
Now that you know how the thought record works, there are a couple of things that might be helpful to understand:
1) It’s hard to hear automatic thoughts at first. If you’re not used to it, be patient. Give yourself time to learn how to listen and hear them. It often helps to talk out your situations and have someone else help you identify your thoughts. Therapy is great for this–I have clients bring empty thought records to me and we fill them out together. It’s so easy for me to hear and write their thoughts as they tell the story. I highly recommend it if you need help.
2) Most people have a hard time distinguishing thoughts from feelings, at first. It often feels like a jumbled mess and it can be tough to tease them apart. The thought record helps you work on this, so keep at it and ask for help if you need it. It’s so much easier to deal with thoughts and emotions when you can see them as the separate entities they are.
3) As you work on this, you’ll begin to notice patterns of thoughts and feelings. Certain feelings will come up often, and will usually be related to the same types of thoughts. It’s good to see how often you’re dealing with the same old things. Very motivating!
4) Over time, you’ll be able to pull out “themes” from your thoughts. For instance, you might always automatically go to the belief that you’re “not good enough,” or that “everyone always abandons” you, or that “life is against” you. It’s good to know what these “themes” are, for then you have the chance to challenge and change them.
5) At first, it may be minutes, hours, or days later that you write things down. It’s hard to want to pay attention to your thoughts and emotions right away at first, even if you hear them. That’s ok. The important thing is to write them down, whenever you do it. Writing them down gives you the chance to come back later, with fresh eyes, and see the truth of the situation. And it also gives you the chance to work on that “truth”.
6) Eventually, you’ll be able to hear the automatic thoughts and beliefs, challenge them, and change the ones you want to change while you’re still in the situation, or even before the situation gets really going. Yep, eventually, if you work on it, you will. How’s that for changing your life?
Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life! (It’s Worked for Me!)
Now you know what a thought record is and, hopefully, why I think it’s such a great tool. I’ve been using thought records, on and off, for over 10 years, and they’ve been essential in helping me identify what’s really going on when I’m feeling powerful emotions or engaging in behaviors I don’t understand and don’t want. I still struggle with hearing and changing my thoughts sometimes, but this tool has been one of the best things I’ve ever learned, for it’s helped me change so many false thoughts and beliefs and thus has helped me overcome so many false emotions. I hope it helps you too!
[author] [author_image timthumb=’on’]http://www.drchristinahibbert.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/square-head-shot1.jpg[/author_image] [author_info]Clinical Psychologist, Mom of 6, Postpartum Couples DVD Producer, Non-Profit Founder, and expert on Parenting, Women’s Emotions, Pregnancy & Postpartum, and Grief & Loss, Dr. Christina Hibbert loves songwriting, learning, and teaching what she learns. An “over-thinker” by nature, Dr. Hibbert’s had plenty of chances to work on “Thought Management” and is happy to share her best ideas and tools with you![/author_info] [/author]
Join me as we learn the next, important steps of using a thought record in: How to Challenge and Change Thoughts Using a Thought Record! (coming soon!)
And, please, leave me your questions and comments below as you try this out! I’d love to know what you think!
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Related Posts:
Thought Management, Part 1: The Link Bewteen Thoughts, FEelings, the Body, & Behavior
How to Make Lasting Change: 5 Lessons that Will Change Your Life!
Personal Growth & Self-Actualization
“If Self-Esteem is a Myth, What is the Truth?”: Understanding Self-Worth (plus video)
The 5 Love Languages: Improve Relationships & Feel the Love! (plus video)
How to NOT Be Ungrateful: 10 Things for Which I am NOT Un-Grateful
I LOVE THOUGHT RECORDS! I’ve gotten out of the habit though. I caught myself in an intrusive thought 2 nights ago. I started shaming myself and thinking what kind of person are you!? BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. I was able to STOP and challenge the thought and show myself that I am not that thought. I think it has been awhile since I’ve been able to catch and hear all those negative thoughts and beliefs. Time to print me out some thought records.
When I first started seeing my therapist she said something that upset me, so I went home and wrote out a thought record. I felt better immediately. I took it with me to my next appointment and shared it with her. She thought that it was fantastic! They really do work!
Thanks so much for your comment, Julie. I’m so glad you’ve found them so helpful (and I’m glad you have a therapist that sees how “healthy” that was for you to do!). I agree, it’s such a useful tool. I don’t use them much anymore either, but every so often, when I get really overwhelmed or out of whack, I pull one out and have at it. It always helps me calm down and see things as they are rather than getting caught up in my crazy emotions. I can’t wait to share “step 2” with everyone! I’m sure you are well-versed in how to alter and challenge thoughts–what a useful tool! 🙂
I do not know whether it’s just me or if perhaps everybody else experiencing problems with your blog. It appears as though some of the written text in your content are running off the screen. Can someone else please comment and let me know if this is happening to them as well? This may be a issue with my web browser because I’ve had this happen before.
Appreciate it
Thanks so much for bringing this to my attention. I’m not seeing anything from my end and I haven’t had any other people voice concerns about this. I’m looking into it from my end, though, just to make sure. 🙂
Its like you read my mind! You seem to know a lot about this, like
you wrote the book in it or something. I think that you could do with some pics
to drive the message home a bit, but other than that, this is magnificent blog.
A fantastic read. I will certainly be back.
Thank you very much. I certainly didn’t write the book on it, but I use it all the time, professionally and personally! And, thank you for the suggestion about adding more photos. I will definitely keep that in mind. I look forward to connecting more in the future! 🙂
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I really appreciate you and your friend stopping by. I’m so glad you are finding the articles helpful. Best wishes!
Hey! Would you mind if I share your blog with my facebook group?
There’s a lot of folks that I think would really enjoy your content. Please let me know. Cheers
Of course! It would be an honor! Thanks so much for sharing. It makes me happy. 🙂
Your weblog appears to be having some compatibilty problems in
my ie browser. The content seems to be running off the page pretty
bad. If you want you can email me at: declan-villarreal@gmail.
com and I’ll shoot you over a screen grab of the problem.
Thank you for the notice. My websmaster assures me everything is fine, but I do believe that in a certain browser, it might not work as well. I would suggest viewing in another browser if the problem persists. Thanks again. 🙂
I came across your blog thanks to Pinterest. Best thing to ever happen to me! I have been looking for this type of information for a long time. I can’t wait until your next post of how to challenge our false thoughts. I am always getting worked up over things that aren’t necessary because of false thoughts and then I react and then feel guilty later, which, as you said, creates a vicious cycle. Thank you thank you thank you!
Thank you so much, Kelly. I can’t tell you how much it means to know this post helped you in some small way. I hope to post the next post/video on this soon! xo