50 Ways to Love Your Loved Ones | Dr. Christina Hibbert

50 Ways to Love Your Loved Ones, www.drchristinahibbert.com

08 Feb 50 Ways to Love Your Loved Ones

Posted at 17:03h in Relationships by Dr. Christina Hibbert 1 Comment

“I love you”–it’s perhaps the most important concept of all time, and yet it’s one of the most taken for granted. We feel love, we say we love, but are we truly loving the ones we love?

Despite what the dictionaries say, in my book, loving is a verb—an action—something we do. When I am loving you, I am showing you how I feel and not just feeling it. Loving moves “love” from an abstract concept into a dynamic experience, creating “moments,” memories, and more meaning in each relationship that matters to us. Loving is the key to a lasting marriage, to a life-long friendship, to a successful parent-child relationship.

And most of us can do a little bit better; I know I’m always looking for ways to better love my loved ones. That’s the great news! We can move beyond simply feeling love or saying, “I love you,” to showing our loved ones we really mean it. To get us started, I’ve come up with 50 ways to love your loved ones. Pick one, ten, or twenty, and start loving a little better today!

50 Ways to Love Your Loved Ones

1) Listen.

2) Say, “You are important. You matter to me.”

3) Laugh together.

4) Play together. (I love playing paddleball when we go to the beach! [My husband and I have the record, but my son and I are a close second-I’m the family champ!])

5) When you feel like criticizing, hold your tongue.

6) Look for the good in them. Then, tell them what you see.

7) Leave a love note in their lunchbox, purse, briefcase, or on their driver’s seat: “Somebody thinks you’re special. Make a great day!”

8) Forgive quickly and often.

9) Learn their “favorites” (color, food, treat, song). Surprise them with a favorite something.

10) Create a memory. Sometimes love is spelled t-i-m-e, so slow down and share your time with those you love. The memories you get will be well worth it! (Like this memory at Lake Powell–we definitely slowed down and spent time!).

11) Say, “Thank you,” and “I appreciate you and all that you do to love me.”

12) Create something together.

13) Teach each other something. Learn from one another.

14) Smile at them in a way that makes your eyes crinkle.

15) When you think something nice about them, share the compliment with them.

16) Apologize as soon as you know you’re wrong.

17) Serve others together.

18) Dedicate something to them.

19) Share your goodies and gifts with them.

20) Bring home a little “treat” from the grocery store.

21) Do one of their “chores” for them.

22) Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

23) Daydream together. Imagine all the wonderful possibilities the future may hold.

24) See their great potential. Tell them what you see.

25) Cook or bake together. (My youngest loves baking bread together!)

26) Ask, “What can I do for you?”

27) Cry together when you or they feel sad.

28) Bring them breakfast in bed.

29) Help them sleep in when they are tired.

30) If you say the wrong thing, say: “I’m sorry. That isn’t what I meant. Can we start over?”

Especially for Couples

31) Hold hands. Kiss. Hug often.

32) Think fondly of each other when you’re apart. Think of the things you love & remember the good times. Text “Thinking of you” or call and tell them.

33) Start a journal together. Take turns leaving notes for one another about your feelings and experiences together.

34) Support their hobbies and passions.

35) Sing a love song to them. (My husband [who doesn’t sing] has done this and it’s highly effective).

36) Take a trip or plan a date based solely on the things they would love to do. Next time, do what you would love to do. (Our anniversary “date” in the dune buggy to Sedona! Guess who’s “love” this was? Actually, it ended up being both of ours.;)

37) Schedule time to be together. Write it on your calendar and keep it like the important appointment it is. Then, do (or don’t do) anything–together.

38) Give them a back or foot rub.

39) Overcome something together.

40) Overlook the little things that can drive you crazy. Instead, remember what first made you “crazy” about them. Share it.

Especially for Kids

41) Light up when you see them.

42) Say, “I think you’re lovely just the way you are.”

43) Be interested in their interests. Ask them to tell you all about it and learn to love it too.

44) Get down on the floor and play, laugh, be silly.

45) Rub their feet when they’re tired and cranky.

46) Draw pictures of how you feel about each other. (This one was drawn for me by my then-six year-old daughter–isn’t it lovely?).

47) Ask, “What were your highs and lows today?” Then, sit patiently and listen.

48) Encourage their efforts rather than praising results. Say, “Wow! You worked so hard on that!”

49) Take them on a one-on-one “date” at least a few times a year. Let them plan what you do.

50) Snuggle as much as you can for as long as they’ll let you.

Bonus:

51) And it doesn’t hurt to say, “I really do love you, and I always will, no matter what,” and mean it, as often as you possibly can.

(Speaking of singing a love song, click the photo, left, to hear my daughter and I sing, “The Song of Love,” an original song we wrote together!)